Jack and Sandy Cutler's phone rings late one
frigid March night in Denver......
Sandy: "Hello?????"
Jay: "Mom, Mom? Is that you?"
Sandy: "Jay???? What's wrong????"
Jay: "Mommy, I need to come home. But not to your house now. You are going to have to sell that one."
frigid March night in Denver......
Sandy: "Hello?????"
Jay: "Mom, Mom? Is that you?"
Sandy: "Jay???? What's wrong????"
Jay: "Mommy, I need to come home. But not to your house now. You are going to have to sell that one."
Sandy:"Jay, what is going on? You're scaring me..."
Jay: sniffling "He likes Matt Cassel better than me...." (now in a full sob) "WHY??????????? WHY, WHEN EVERYTHING WAS GOING SO GOOD? WE JUST HAD AN 8-8 SEASON, ANNNNND WE EVEN LOST THE LAST 3 GAMES OF THE YEAR TO MISS THE PLAYOFFS! WHAT MORE DOES HE WANT FROM ME????"
Sandy: "Who baby? What more does who want from you?"
Jay: " That doodie-head Josh McDaniel."
Sandy:"Your coach?"
Jay: "yes"
Sandy: "Aw honey, everything will work itself out. Tell me what I can do."
Jay: "Can I have some ninnie?"
Sandy:(embarassed)"Jay you are 25 years old, you are a big boy now. You were only allowed to have ninnie until you graduated college. I knew I should have taken your binky away too... Besides, after I went through menopause, I lost the ability to lactate."
Jay:"But... but.... mom.... PLEASE. I need it.... Will you atleast pump some and put it in a ba-ba for me?"
Sandy:"You aren't hearing me son. My body doesn't do that anymore..."
Jay: "Well, your body is stupid and you are being mean to me. You just wait until tomorrow. I am going to call Chris Mortensen to set up an exclusive interview to tell the nation how stupid your body is and that I want to be traded out of THIS FAMILY!!!!! AND I AM MOVING AWAY!!! SO NANNY-NANNY BOO-BOO STICK YOUR HEAD IN DOO-DOO"
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